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INSIDE THE SYSTEM
Two strikes for Jenna

June 8, 2001 | Page 6

JENNA BUSH'S hankering for a cold, frosty one has got her in trouble--for the second time in two months. This time, she dragged into the fray her twin sister Barbara who is home from Yale for the summer.

Though young people can be tried in criminal court as an adult at 16 or even younger, the drinking age is still 21. So when 19-year-old Jenna Bush tried to use false identification to buy alcohol, the employees at Chuy's Mexican restaurant called 911 to report the Bush twins.

This was Barbara Bush's first criminal citation, but Jenna had to plead no contest last month after she was arrested with a beer at an Austin nightclub while Secret Service agents waited outside. She was ordered to attend alcohol awareness classes and pay $50 in court costs.

Jenna also made headlines in March when she had her Secret Service agents pick up a friend from jail after his arrest at a Fort Worth frat party.

With this second criminal charge, Jenna could face a potential 60-day suspension of her driver's license, more rigorous community service and a $500 fine.

If she gets a third strike, the zero-tolerance policy instituted by her father when he was Texas governor means that she would automatically lose her driver's license for 90 days and could spend up to six months in jail.

The White House is keeping quiet on the matter. "The president views this as a family matter, a private matter, and he will treat it as such," White House spokesperson Ari Fleischer told reporters. "I would urge you to be very careful because any reaction of the parents is parental; it is not governmental," he said. "It is family. It's private, and the American people respect that."

Maybe Fleischer should call up Bill Clinton and tell him about his change of heart.

--Agence France Presse, June 1, 2001

Bush: You could be president, too

WHEN GEORGE W. Bush received an honorary degree from Yale University--his alma mater--he had this advice for graduating seniors. "To those of you who received honors, awards and distinctions, I say, well done," Bush pontificated. "And to the C students, I say to you: you, too, can be president of the United States."

But Bush forgot to add that you'll also need to choose your parents wisely. They should be wealthy, white and politically connected. And it won't hurt if your dad was also president.

--Newsweek, June 4, 2001

Racist sicko heads to Agriculture Dept.

DESPITE THE obvious racism of his nominee, George W. Bush is standing by his man. Bush nominated Thomas Dorr as undersecretary of agriculture for rural development.

But in December 1999, Dorr told an Iowa State University conference that three of the most successful "rural economic environments" in Iowa were "not particularly diverse."

"At least not ethnically diverse," he told the conference. "They're very diverse in their economic growth, but they're very focused, have been very nondiverse in their ethnic background and their religious background. And there's something there that has enabled them to succeed and to succeed very well."

But the Bush administration still gives Dorr its full support, according to White House spokesperson Scott Stanzel. "Those comments were taken out of context and are an unfair representation of Mr. Dorr's views," Stanzel said. "We urge the senators to listen to Mr. Dorr during his confirmation hearing because any rush to judgment would shortchange the process and a fine nominee."

--New York Times, May 31, 2001

Heard it through the grapevine

"IF YOU set aside Three Mile Island and Chernobyl, the safety record of nuclear is really very good."
--PAUL O'NEILL, Treasury Secretary on Bush's energy policy

"THIS ANTIGLOBALIZATION movement is largely the well intentioned but ill informed being led around by the ill intentioned and well informed (protectionist unions and anarchists)...By inhibiting global trade expansion they are choking the only route out of poverty for the world's poor. Which is why these 'protesters' should be called by their real name: The Coalition to Keep Poor People Poor."
--THOMAS FRIEDMAN on Quebec City protesters

"THERE'S NO doubt that this illegal squatter in the Oval Office is not to be trusted farther than you can throw Katherine Harris. But, please, let's cut the crap and tell the truth--George W. Bush has done little more than continue the policies of the last eight years of the Clinton/Gore administration. As hard as that is for many to swallow, that is the truth--and the sooner you stop the scare campaign, the sooner we'll be able to fight Bush in a way that will stop him for good."
--Filmmaker MICHAEL MOORE on Democrats who try to blame all things evil on Dubya

"PEOPLE WHO are well represented at trial do not get the death penalty."
--U.S. Supreme Court Justice RUTH BADER GINSBERG on the death penalty

"TO SHOW there are no hard feelings, the White House sent Sen. Jeffords a gift--a set of Firestone tires for his car."
--Comedian DOUG GAMBLE

"AFTER HIS experience in the general election, Bush thought Republicans could hold their Senate majority with the second highest vote total."
--Comedian DAVE WERNER

"IT IS time to set aside the old partisan bickering and finger-pointing and name-calling that comes from freeing parents to make different choices for their children."
--GEORGE W. BUSH

"I THINK we're making progress. We understand where the power of this country lay. It lays in the hearts and souls of Americans. It must lay in our pocketbooks. It lays in the willingness for people to work hard. But as importantly, it lays in the fact that we've got citizens from all walks of life, all political parties, that are willing to say, I want to love my neighbor. I want to make somebody's life just a little bit better."
--BUSH

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